Wonderful

It was Christmas 1989, and my then boyfriend, who would go on to become my future husband, gave me what would become our first shared Christmas ornament. It was a sepia toned photo, wrapped around a Christmas ball ornament, of Mary and George from It’s A Wonderful Life, looking lovingly into each other’s eyes. This single ornament set the entire tone and intention for what would be our great love story—to love and be loved.

DAUGHTER: Mommy, why is It’s A Wonderful Life your favorite movie? It seems so depressing, and it makes you cry every year.

ME: I love it because I can relate to it, and it reminds me of what matters most.

DAUGHTER: How so?

ME: It’s a movie about someone who, in the pursuit of a lifelong dream that never comes true, learns the true value and purpose of life—to love and be loved.

DAUGHTER: But it’s so sad that his dream never comes true.

ME: It is sad. It’s also realistic. Many people have dreams that never come true, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have a wonderful life. George Bailey’s dream was to travel the world. My dream was to be the love child of Martin Luther King Jr. and Barbra Streisand: a Nobel peace prize winning EGOT recipient (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony) for spreading healing love, laughter, and understanding through the arts. (Nothing too big. 😂🤣) I still have that dream, but the dream that matters most is to stand like George Bailey facing a roomful of friends and family and know I lived my life’s purpose: to love and be loved. In the movie, when we hear Clarence the Angel say, “Remember, no one is a failure who has friends,” I collapse into a pool of gratitude tears. I’m so grateful for the love in my life, for all of my friends and family; for truly, that’s what I cherish most: the treasure of deep connections, the honor of truly loving others in meaningful ways.

It’s also important to remember that even though it’s sad to see someone have a dream that doesn’t come true, the movie ends before he does; maybe his dreams come true after all. I hold on to that hope when I hear him say, “I want to live again!” Every day of our lives is a chance to choose to live, to really live, to pursue our dreams and to nurture our most important relationships with ourselves and others. To have a friend, we have to be a friend; and the gift of being a friend can be even more rewarding than the gift of having a friend.

DAUGHTER: I’m so glad you’re not just my mommy, but you’re also my friend.

ME: I’m so grateful you’re not just my daughter, but also my friend too. I love you.

DAUGHTER: I love you, Mommy!

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